Friday, December 30, 2005


My office is jam-packed at the moment, and I share the officers' room with 4 other colleagues. Heh, no privacy betul. One fart, and everybody can smell it hehehe not me la, ladies don't fart in public (or try to do it soundlessly...). One of my colleagues, let's call him Mr Loneranger, is really a loner. Mr Loneranger has one close friend, a Mr Rudecaller. I'll tell you in a minute, why I call that chap 'rudecaller'.
There's a phone on all five desks, and if any phone rings when the desk occupant is not in, someone else will 'pull' the line (do you know what I mean?) and answer the call from his/her own phone. Kitorang biasa terkena ngan Rudecaller ni if he calls time yang Loneranger takde. Loneranger ni plak selalu lesap entah ke mana pada waktu pejabat, ikut suka hati tok nenek dia je, so selalu la kitorang jawabkan call dia. Kaez, please don't start with the 'biasalah orang gomen' thingy, OK! Sebab aku (and most of my colleagues!) pun orang gomen, tapi takde plak buat perangai gitu :-P

Anyway, Rudecaller (RC) ni memang takde phone etiquette. A normal call would go like this :-

<ring ring>
Me : Hello
RC : Loneranger ada?
Me : Dia takde buat masa ni. Ada...
RC : < letak talipon>
Me : ... pesanan...? !!@#%??? dia dah letak talipon!!!

Isy... pantang betul aku, bila orang letak talipon masa aku belum habis bercakap! Dah la takde hello ke, bagi salam ke, bila kita dah jawab, takde terima kasih, terus letak talipon gitu. How rude! So the next time I had to answer Rudecaller's call, it went like this :-

<ring ring>
Me : Hello
RC : Loneranger ada?
Me : Takde! <letak talipon>

Hah! Have a taste of your own medicine, Rudecaller! Seronok kan, when people hang up on you?

Then early last week, lagi rude dia buat. Loneranger's phone rang, and I 'pulled' the line to answer the call.

<ring ring>
Me : Hello
RC : <letak talipon>
Me : Whaddafook !!@#%???

This happened twice more within a half hour. Aku geram betul. So what did I do the fourth time Loneranger's phone rang?

<ring ring>
Me : <silent>
RC : Hello?
Me : <letak talipon>

Muaahahaaaa.... * Jie, jahatnya!* Meanwhile, Cheshu & Cheis dok tergolek-golek gelak hehehe

After the third time I did that, I think Rudecaller learnt his lesson. These days, he calls Loneranger on his mobile phone *wicked grin*

Wednesday, December 28, 2005


Didja have a good break over the weekends, didja? Starting with Christmas last weekend, for the next month or so, there's gonna be lotsa public holidays with the New Year, Chinese New Year, Awal Muharram and Hari Wilayah coming up. Berlambak la kerja ofis yang tak siap...

Anyway, spent the better part of last Saturday at my newly completed house, yay! Cleaned up the house, swept, vaccumed & mopped floors. Pulled out weeds from the monkey-legs-stretch-sized patch of soil they call a garden. Banyaknya kena pakai duit, with all the installation of door grills, curtain rods, ceiling fans, lightings, bathroom fixtures etc. Tu pun tengah berkira-kira nak buat ke tidak kitchen cabinet & sink, adeeehhhh.... fenin. Nasib baik nak rent out, so just buat the basic furnishings je dulu.

Sunday, kekonon nak gi outing, but flat out from the previous day's manual labour, so just veg out at home. Monday was also a lazy lazy day, eat out sebab malas masak.

Whaddayaknow... I actually sat through the whole season's Desperate Housewives, the whole 6 dvds! Now THAT's what I call Desperate hehehe pathetic actually! Tapi tulahnya bila lama-lama tengok tu, I'm beginning to like the character Edie Britt. Even though she's a b!tch & a $lut, but at least she's true to herself and is a go-getter! Tak puas hati dengan the ending - sad ending for everybody. Rasa nak pulang balik dvd tu kat nyonya pasar malam tu hehehe

Isy... lawanya Eva Longoria tu... *jeles* *jeles*

Anyway, I'll be renting out the house in a few weeks time. Ya got any tips for me? Yalah, tips on how to find good tenants etc. Appreciate any advice I can get, mate!

Saturday, December 24, 2005


I'm currently reading (re-reading actually) a book entitled 'Desert Flower', an autobiography by Waris Dirie. Easy reading, interesting story. Waris was born in 1965 in Somalia to a nomadic family. At age 13, she ran away, when her father tried to marry her off to a 60-years old man for an exchange of five camels. Boleh tahan mahal jugak duit hantaran dia, for an uneducated desert girl, as I'm told by someone who went to Egypt last year, that the market price for a camel is USD650. Translate the five camels to Ringgit Malaysia... and men here complain that the local girls's hantaran costs too much.. hmmph.

Back to Waris, she made it from the desert to the capital (Mogadishu) and all the way to Britain, through a series of fortunate events and help from some kind souls. By chance, a photographer took a picture of her and stuck it in a magazine, and wallah! She became a supermodel. Man, talk about being at the right place at the right time! Waris is now based in New York, married and with child(ren?) She has resigned from modelling though, and is actively involved as a UN special embassador, campaigning for African women's rights, particularly against female genital mutilation as practiced in some parts of Africa and the Middle East.

Actually, it's circumcision. Oh hey, if you are prone to flaming cheeks when viewing anything remotely connected with s-e-x, you may stop reading here, even though there's nothing 'dirty' about this posting. And you shouldn't watch MTV either, ya?

OK, circumcision. Over here it is a mere nick on the clitoris (are you still reading? you have been forewarned...) buat syarat je. But over there as experienced by Waris herself, it involves cutting off the whole clitoris, the labia minora and a part of the labia majora, then stitching the remaining parts together and leaving a tiny tiny hole for her urine and menstrual blood to flow out, drop by drop. All this done in the middle of the desert in a most unsanitary way, with a rusty blade and no aenesthetics nor painkillers thereafter. Many girls have succumbed to septicaemia or excessive bleeding, and die within days. This practice is also known as infibulation. It is supposedly done to ensure girls remain virgins until their wedding night. Bollocks! It's just male empowerment, innit? Sex is a two-way thing. The more effective method would be to cut of the sexist's thingy muaaahahahaa... *evil laugh*

OK, seriously folks, reading this book reminds me to be thankful for what I have. Despite Waris's graphic descriptions, I can't imagine a life (for me) without the basic comforts of running water and electricity, never mind the Tiffany accessories or dinner at La Bodega :-) Life is harsh for them, especially the women. And the cruel practice of infibulation is too gruesome to even think about. Unfortunately it is supported, nay, 'protected' as a cultural practice, even by some of the women there.

There are some nice bits in her story too. The beautiful desert sun. Sleeping under the stars. Being truly connected with nature and the animal kingdom. Her mother's strength of character and sense of humour. How simple and stress-free their life was, except when there is a drought. Taking pleasure in the simplest things, like occasionally eating plain rice with milk, as a treat. I learned a thing or two about their 'must do' attitude, where nobody ever comes up with excuses for not doing their part. For example, if you're supposed to go look for water, you won't come home without it, as there's no point in coming home with excuses only to see your family and livestock die from dehydration. Even without thinking about it, they take their responsibilities very seriously for their daily survival in such harsh environment, and yet they're happy.

Btw, you might wanna know what happens to the infibulated girls on their wedding night... aiyah, go read the book la. All I can say is... sick b@st@rds *pardon my french*.


Friday, December 23, 2005


Cheda has been getting calls on her mobile from a mystery number with a '07' prefix for the past three days. The caller was a young woman who refuses to state her name and reason for calling, answering all questions with 'tak tahu's. We joked that maybe she thinks that her husband is having an affair with Cheda *LOL* - why do people always assume the worst, even in jest? hehehe it could very well have been a wrong number, or even a prank.

Anyway, this morning we decided enough was enough, the calls were giving us the creeps. Cheti being the most 'makcik' type, was given the task of calling up the mystery caller's ('MC') number.

Cheti : Hello ni siapa?
MC : Saya
Cheti : Siapa nama awak?
MC : *silence* saya Nor
Cheti : Kenapa awak asyik call kawan saya?
MC : *quiet sobbing* Tak tahu...
Cheti : Kenapa awak ganggu dia?
MC : *silence* Mengganggu ke?
Cheti : Mana awak dapat nombor dia?
MC : *sobbing* Tak tahu *more sobbing* Saya macam terpanggil untuk talipon....
Cheti : Siapa suruh awak call?
MC : *moan* Tak tahu... Ada orang suruh....
Cheti : Siapa?
MC : *louder moan* Orang dalam diri saya.....*moan*
Cheti's jaw dropped!
Cheti : Awak ni sakit ke?
MC : *sniffle* Selsema sikit
Cheti : Awak ni sakit jiwa ke? Minta family awak bawa awak jumpa doktor, ye?
MC : *in a loud voice, no more sobs or moans* Ya! Dengan izin Allah!

Mental case la pompuan ni agaknya. Said that both parents are gone, and she is staying with her sister, but at the moment is home alone because she's unemployed. Gave us her name, her sister's name, and home address. She might be depressed, delusional, or have some other mental illness. I hope she gets some medical attention soon. Anyway, should we try to get in touch with her sister to alert her? What do you think? {Oh, btw, that question only applies assuming she's telling us the truth la hehehe}

Wednesday, December 21, 2005


I have a pretty normal life according to the normal standard. Right after uni, I chambered, got a job, then got married and ten years later I have these; 3 lovely kids, a car, an apartment, a highly stressful job that pays for all my bills and not forgetting a partner (we agreed from day one that the marriage is on equal footing, after all marriage is a contract what!!!) so understanding sometimes he makes me feel suffocated. I know some people would kill to get what I have now, but deep down inside I feel something is still not quite right. Till now I still can't figure that out.

It's not that I'm not gratefull, I feels that I need more excitement and away from the boring rituals. In short, nothing exciting happens in my life anymore. Bosan, mama bosan!

Tracking back, I had so much excitement during my uni days. Most things were done impromptu, with only minimal planning. At one time, I just pack a bag and together with Nore, Reyh and Am spent five blissful days in a budget chalet at Pantai Chenang, Langkawi. That was very memorable, we decided that we should do the same getaway, in Bali, on the 10th anniversary of that trip. I remembered telling Nore that most probably she cannot join us then due to commitment towards hubby and children. You see, Nore was the social butterfly and can attract the opposite gender just by batting her eyelid (lebih kuranglah, I know I exaggerate, Jie please correct me if I'm wrong!). Man, was I so wrong! The opposite happened, me and Reyh got hitched along the way while Nore and Am are leading a fabulous single life.

Another time, me and a few bunch of friends, decided that after library closed at 11 pm on Tuesday, we should go to Cameron Highland to eat fresh strawberries. So all of us pack a bag and start our journey at 12.30 am Wednesday. We drove to Tapah and catch forty winks in a carpark near a chinese school there. 7 am on Wednesday, after breakfast of roti canai, we continue our journey uphill. In 1992, Cameron Highland was still unspoilt unlike now. I remembered, it was so cold, fresh and breezy, we were hugging each other for some warmth. We hunt for fresh starwberries at one of the farms there, then by lunchtime we head to Ipoh for some mean nasi kandar somewhere near some famous padang (till now I don't know where it was!). After lunch, someone came out with the idea of having picnic by the sea, so we bought some food and head to Pantai Teluk Batik in Lumut, about an hour journey from Ipoh. Reached at the beach 4 pm, had great time swimming and picnicking, by 7 pm we went to Ipoh again for dinner before making our move back towards KL. When we reached Bidor, everybody were too tired to continue the journey, so we slept in the car in front of Bidor Caltex petrol station till Thursday morning. Left Bidor about 7am and reached KL around 10. The moment my head reached the pillow in my room at the hostel, I zonked out till the next day.

Now I can only reminiscing all the good old days. Nothing happen nowadays, I'm so, so bored! Am I asking too much? Am I ungrateful?

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Tumpang Sekaki...

Jie has been pestering me to do my own blog for quite sometime. Me, being me, one of the most malas person on earth, don't have dedication to religiously update and anything that requires maintenance is a big no no for me. So, the solution is to allow me tumpang sekaki at her blog. Jie, tumpang lalu ye....

I have a lot to bitch about. In fact, we have been having the regular bitching session, sometimes over nothing! Just to blow some steam off our head. But, be warned! I'm not so creative or eloquent as Jie. She very clever write one, I on the other hand merapu a lot! So Jie, jangan menyesal ye...

Till next time, adios!


Minggu lepas banyak muka keriut-keriut *fikir* "beli baju sekolah, kasut sekolah, buku teks, buku kerja, alatulis, bayar yuran sekolah, yuran sekolah agama, tambang bas..."

Hari ni banyak muka dah cerah *fikir* "yahoo! gaji masuk hari ni! boleh beli baju sekolah, kasut sekolah, buku teks, buku kerja, alatulis, bayar yuran sekolah, yuran sekolah agama, tambang bas..."

Hati-hati berbelanja bang, akak.

Jangan nanti pertengahan Januari muka keriut semula *fikir* "ari ni nak makan maggi ke biskut ke?"

Tapi tulahnya, memang mahal belanja nak sekolahkan anak sekarang ye?

Sunday, December 18, 2005


I've wanted to do this post since adam, but have not had the time. Tonight, my insomnia got the better of me, so I might as well do something productive :-)

I first fell in love with G in my uni days. I heard his voice first, before I ever saw him. I was passing by the entrance of my uni's Grand Hall, when I heard him. I suddenly stopped and stood transfixed. Where did that voice come from? Such deep intonations, such melodious rythm, beautiful beautiful voice. How does he look like? I've got to see him! But oh, I'm a freshie, wouldn't it be inappropriate if I just barge in like that?

In the end my curiosity won over, and I peeped in. There he was in all his glorious ensemble, looking stately and proud! I was dizzy with excitement, so excited I could scream. I want him! I want him! Alas. We only got formally introduced a few weeks later. I remember sitting demurely 'bersimpuh' in front of him, smiling and gazing longingly. The first time I held his stick, touched his hard shiny surfaces... I knew he's the one for me.

Hahaha... I can't go on, otherwise this will be an 18SX post :-D

'G' stands for Gamelan, the traditional musical ensemble! It's true, I fell in love with it in uni, and I played it all the years that I there, initially as a co-curriculum activity, but later on as a member of the uni's gamelan group. After I graduated, I pursued learning gamelan for about a year at Kompleks Budaya and obtained a Certificate. I actually got nominated for KBN's gamelan instructor course, but by then work was taking over my life so I had to leave the class. That's as far as it got, though I sometimes wish I had continued. Anyway, here's a little something about gamelan. This is a long post. OK, don't say I didn't warn you!

The word Gamelan derives from the javanese word 'gamel' which means 'to strike'. The Malaysian Gamelan originates from Riau-Lingga and was first performed in the courts of Sultan Ahmad of Pahang. When a Pahang princess, Tengku Mariam married Sultan Zainal Abidin II of Terengganu, she brought gamelan with her, and it flourished under her creative attention. She even wrote some songs herself, and in all it totaled at 39 songs. The Terengganu gamelan differs from the javanese in the type of instruments used, the range of notes and scales used. The Terengganu uses the slendro scale (pentatonic) while the javanese uses the pelog scale. In the past, it is only played in the royal courts or at special ceremonies.

Here are some members of the clan :-

The spiritual leader of the ensemble is the big black gong called the 'Gong Agung', usually played only twice, once to signify the start and once to signify the end of a song. These bronze gongs have varying notes and tunes, and are infrequently hit compared to other instruments, maybe once or twice in a 4-notes bar, as punctuations.

The leader of the song, le capitaine, he determines the tempo and rythm of the song, how many repeats to be played etc. The rest of the clan depends on him to orchestrate the presentation.

The wooden xylophone, much like a normal xylophone. It is played using wooden sticks in the 'cincang' motion. The only instrument I suck at :-(

Big bronze kettle drums, like the gongs, are infrequently hit and used mostly as punctuations. Played using wooden drumsticks.

In the ensemble I played with, we had 2 of each 3 types of saron namely Saron Peking, Saron Penerus & Saron Demong, making a total of 6 sarons in all. These are metallophones, bronze bars suspended on the frames. The Demong and Penerus are played using a wooden mattel with the right hand, while the left hand softly touches the the stricken bar to reduce its vibrations so that it's note won't merge into the next note to be hit. The Peking however, have a horn-shaped mattel, and the notes are played double-time. The sarons differ in sizes, Peking being smallest and Demong biggest. Easy-peasy.

And this, people, is my instrument of choice, the bronze kettledrums. There's two types of bonang, namely Bonang Barung and Bonang Penerus, the Barung being the main instrument playing the melody. There are ten kettledrums suspended within the frame in 2 rows, and played using two wooden drumsticks. The righthand drumstick controls the top three and bottom two kettledrums, while the lefthand controls the other five. They are also played using the 'cincang' motion, where the righthand strikes one note and the lefthand strikes the corresponding note a fraction of a second later, to create a melodious rythm. Advanced players can play the 'bunga' where some music bars are totally altered and played at double time, for more ummph. The player's hand movements are graceful and seemingly 'dancing' atop the kettledrums. This one is a real toughie.

The sounds of the gamelan is very unique, soft and melodious sometimes, loud and passionate at others. The tempo can change widely within one song. Some songs I remember are Togok, Timang Burung, Antawada, Perang Manggung, Ketam Renjung and Ayak-Ayak, lovelies! The songs are sometimes accompanied by dances with graceful flitting movements, swaying and weaving to the music, using specific limbs and fingers movements and facial expressions to tell the story behind the songs.

Gamelan being a royal court performance, has a certain 'spirituality' in it. If a song is played properly and 'dihayati', it can be quite a moving experience for both performers and observers. Indeed in the olden days, gamelan dancers sometimes enter a trance-like state, and will have to be 'dipulihkan' or revived by using a specific song - I forgot the title of this one.

Being spiritual also means that the instruments are respected and treated accordingly. The instruments are moved with care, and must never be stepped on or stepped over. Players have to take off their shoes and sit in the proper manner when playing them. Players must not abuse or monkey around with the instruments. It is believed that if the instruments are ill-treated, it will anger the 'semangat' which will spoil the key or note of the instruments.

Of late, there have been many efforts taken to popularize gamelan. The Rythm In Bronze concert by a local theatre group, for one. Most local universities and quite a few foreign universities too have their own ensemble and clubs. They write new songs, modern songs, and try to incorporate new sounds or techniques into their performance, or use it to accompany theatrical or musical performances. Some groups even have a repertoire of 'fun' songs which listeners can better relate to, like 'Sukiyaki' and 'Madu & Racun'.

As for me, having been under the tutelage of a traditional and highly respected mentor, En. Othman Abdullah, who is a direct descendant of one of Terengganu's royal court performer, Mak Nang, I am a purist for this particular art. I am glad that gamelan has gained popularity in that the instruments will be kept alive for and by the next generation. But I am also sad that in such due process, the gamelan might lose it's spirit of life.

Chewah, macam nak buat thesis aje hehehe :-)


Hoi hoi tak habis lagi orang bercerita sal ketuk-ketampi ni. Inkuiri dah selesai, tapi witch hunt still going on, hmmph.

Ramai yang blame polis, tak sepatutnya buat gitulah etc etc. Tapi kira OK la tu polis kita suruh buat ketuk ketampi aje. Depa berdiri jauh & tengok je, takde physical contact. Hangpa prefer body cavity search ka? Isy.... korek-korek ni, lagi trauma tau.

Aku rasa la, method tu tak keterlaluan, kita je over-reacting sebab tak boleh imagine diri kita terkena something like that. But polis pun, bukan la semua tahanan kena gitu, only if they have a valid suspicion yang orang tu ada conceal drugs etc. I got to know from an obgyn, that the pelvic muscle can be trained to hold in stuff like drugs. Tapi no matter how well trained pun, after alot of ketuk ketampi, the muscle akan strain and let go juga. Ala, hangpa yang biasa gi Phuket tu mesti tau kan, siap ada tiger show dancer yang guna pelvic muscle to shoot darts etc. {Err... orang cakap la, Jie tak pernah gi Phuket pun hehehe} Hmm... *thinking* Tapi kan, orang yang rakam benda tu, especially kalau inside job, memang patut kena semelih.

So, nak mintak maaf ngan kerajaan China? Nak suruh pelancong yang tak setuju tu balik negeri sendiri? Nak replace ketuk ketampi dengan x-ray? Susah betul, bila mulut berjalan dulu daripada otak, kan? Hehehe :-) Tapi aku paham. Sesiapa yang biasa pegi nonton pakleman pun mesti dah lali dengan aksi-aksi orang gadang ni. Siapa kuat bercakap, dia akan lebih fofular, so bila keluar je isu yang menarik, maka berlumba-lumba la si luncai terjun dengan labi-labinya... lalalaaaa... nonton komedi di pentas dunia...


Remember our trip to Balai Seni Lukis Negara years and years ago, Kaez?

This particular sculpture caught our attention. "Bujang Berani" by Bayu Utomo. Walk up to an art piece, view, ponder for a while, macam la paham sangat pun hehehe. After that, the more important part of the trip - crossover to the Railway Station A&W to gobble up waffle, rootbeer, coney dog, heaven la zaman tu!

Suddenly pikiranku melayang-layang, teringat those days, when we had time to go outing, meraban, tengok wayang - you're the movie nut who can actually watch 2 movies back to back kan. Hehehe this is all your fault, for bringing up that 17-years bit in your earlier comment!

btw, I still love that particular sculpture.


Semalam tengok gambar album staf dalam intranet, pastu gelak sampai pecah perut hehehe. Ada yang muka cam budak sekolah. Ada yang remos panjang cam hero filem tamil. Ada yang mekap tebal selepet eyeshadow biru dan lipstick merah biji saga. Ada yang frame cermin mata bulat besar menutup satu pertiga dari mukanya. Medem, fuuuhhh... dengan rambut ala Farah Fawcet dalam Charlie's Angels gitu! Semuanya gambar yang staf hantar masa mula report duty, tu yang style macam-macam tu.

Nak nengok album ni, kena isi borang untuk dapatkan password. Aku dapat access ni sebab jadik web rep. So selain dari tugas-tugas extra tu, I can amuse myself looking at these photos, some of which are quite kelakau. Aku pernah query pada member aku officer MIS, apa tujuan diadakan album ni dan kenapa ada sekatan to view it? Bagi aku, elok kalau sebelum meeting ke apa ke, kita dapat nengok gambar siapa yang kita akan bermeeting tu, takdelah nanti tercangak-cangak wondering who's who etc. Kalau staf tak boleh tengok album ni, tercapai ke objektif diadakan album ni in the first place? Member aku senyum kelat je :-) Jawapannya, ada orang sensitif bila orang tengok gambar lama dia.

Alahai... alasan ciput je tu. Sensitif sebab apa? Gambar tak cantik? Gantikan dengan gambar baru la. Takde masalah sebab tahun lepas kita buat operasi besar-besaran ambik gambar official (taken in the office by our own photographers) to be used for our library database. Cantek je semua orang pakai kot & nametag. Import je la gambar tu ke dalam album staf. Apa ada hal?


Aiseh, dapat assignment baru. Kena jadik web rep untuk department aku, walhal aku ni rabun IT hehehe. Rabun, but learning la. Semua Bahagian dalam agensi aku kena nominate 2 officer jadik wakil web ni. Tugas khas balaci ni ialah 'membangunkan laman web Bahagian masing-masing, dengan bantuan MIS'. Waa... gomen sekarang kan menuju ke paperless organization, semua orang kena jadik IT savvy. Hatta tukang jaga lif pun sok-sok nak cuti, kena apply guna borang online.

That's all & well, tapi kemudahan dan latihan kenalah bergerak seiring dengan visi. Kalau komputer jurutaip masih guna 486 dengan Windows 98 dan printer dot matrix (sungguh, ujud lagi printer zaman jurassic ni kat ofis aku. Buktinya, aku sendiri ada sebijik. Hah!) , jangan la harap surat atau dokumen yang dihasilkan tu cantik belaka. Kalau pengarah yang dah nak pencen, diberi laptop canggih-manggih, jangan lupa ajar depa cara menggunakannya, takut nanti laptop tu bawak balik, anak depa plak yang guna untuk chatting.

Officer cabuk cam aku ni, setelah sekian lama guna komputer zaman batu - punyalah kuno, takde port nak cucuk thumbdrive pun - barulah minggu lepas dapat komputer baru. Idak le canggih ke mana pun, tapi at least guna Windows XP. Yang tak syoknya komputer aku tu bisu, takdak sepikar. Admin control habih, tak boleh ubah sebenda pun kecuali desktop & screensaver, tu pun yang sedia ada, tak boleh download atau install lain. Internet, takyah cakap la mostly kena block, even Yahoo! No downloading anything.

Bukan apa, kalau gini keadaannya, nanti yang 'kurang ilmu' dan 'kurang kemudahan' dikatakan tidak cemerlang dalam tugasan. Yang ada kemudahan canggih tapi 'kurang ilmu', alamatnya kemudahan tu jadik tukun je la. Yang 'kurang kemudahan' tapi sangat berminat untuk mencari ilmu, bila disekat atas bawah kiri kanan depan belakang, terus la terbantut....

Sunday, December 11, 2005


We ordered pizza last night.
From the nationally-reknowned pizza place.
One number for the whole nation.
Where pizzas get delivered in 30 minutes.
The pizza comes piping hot in it's own bag.

We ordered pizza assam laksa.
Cause we like it hot, tekak melayu la kan.
The pizza got delivered.
In 45 minutes, 'because we're busy tonight la cik'

First bite onto the first slice.
We were mystified.
It looks like pizza asam laksa.
But it doesn't smell nor taste like assam laksa.
The Sauce! The Sauce!

We knew then it was the mystical mediterranean sauce.
Which was smothered all over our pizza.
But sprinkled with the regular assam laksa topping.
How can this be?

So we called them up again.
One number for the whole nation.
We were told that the branch manager.
Kelana Jaya, Kelana Jaya.
Will call us right back.

And his explaination was :-
They ran out of assam laksa sauce.
So they substituted it with the moroccan sauce.
And try to pass if off as the original
Our original Pizza Assam Laksa

Eh, boleh pulak ke buat camni?????
Dah la mahal, main tukar silih-ganti ikut suka hati tok nenek dia je?

Hut? More like Hood. With an L and a U and an M.


Actually mood kureng sket lately ni. On top of all the happenings in the office, I just found out yesterday that sis is pregnant again. Don't get me wrong, I really am very happy for her, because she's been trying for about a year now, so this is a much-awaited blessings, but it's salt unto my wounds. I am just wallowing in self-pity here.

I'm tired of looking longingly at what isn't currently within my reach.
I'm tired of sharing other people's joyous occassions, only to be empty-handed at the end of the day.
I'm tired of listening to the mind-numbing 'my hubby did this, my hubby did that' chatters from colleagues (which I tried to avoid even when I was still married)
I'm tired of ooh-ing and aah-ing over other people's babies pictures, even though some of them are, frankly, un-cute (to call babies ugly is quite mean la kan)
I'm tired being asked 'anak berapa?' which seems to be the standard questions by one malaysian to another, even if it's to a stranger.
I'm tired of loving other people's kids.
See a pattern here?

I love kids, but as fate would have it, I have yet to get a chance to undergo the motherhood experience. Such a loss, years of theoretical & mental preparations are now gone to waste. In a different place (say, US) and a different condition (if it is permissible in my religion), I might even consider in-vitro conception with an anonymous donor. But of course, that's wishful thinking.

So please excuse me, if lately I don't seem to be so eager to visit a relative or friend who's just given birth, or if I fail to attend your baby's cukur jambul kenduri, or if I don't turn up for your kid's birthday party. If we do meet, no need to automatically hand over your baby for me to carry. Don't expect I'll be cooing or singing lullabyes to your baby.

This morning a friend tried to pep talk me out of my doldrums. Thanx a bunch, honeybunch, like I said, you're a good buddy :-) I know I shouldn't feel this way, and I know what I should do. But I also know that I am human, with very fragile innerness. Things have been going around in circles lately, been there done that bought the t-shirt, now here we go loop de loop, woohoo! "Stop wallowing in self-pity, and focus on what you have that can lift you up", right? Honeybunch, this wallowing trip, I have to walk it alone, by myself, at the moment.

And this blog where I sometimes let my hair down, well, please bear with me, people.

Meanwhile, to 'manja' myself today, I wallop almost a tubful of Ben & Jerry's Butter Pecan. Yummy yummy, I tell you! Maybe tomorrow I'll get the Chunky Monkey pulak :-D


Haven't logged in for quite some time. Busy busy busy at the office and at home too. Many things happened, I'll just give the gist of it :-

1. We had our office's Majlis Aidilfitri on the last week of Syawal. As usual, the Badan Kebajikan (BK) will sponsor the main menu (this year being nasi dagang, from Sheila Rusly's restaurant. Yummy I tell you!) and staff members will bring potluck for other dishes, absolutely voluntary la. Then medem keluar fatwa, 'biar BK bayar semua, orang lain tak payah sponsor'. Adeeehhhh makcik ni, orang bawak potluck tu sebab niat ikhlas nak share food dengan kengkawan, kenapa nak halang orang bersedekah? Jawabnya senang je - sebab dia takde nak sponsor apa-apa.

Aku memang tak faham kepala hotak dia ni. Maybe jugak api amarahnya pasal family day dulu tu belum padam, sampai terbawa-bawa ke majlis raya. Pastu ada hati jemput semua pengurusan tertinggi plus chairman lagi, walaupun tau BK dah takde bajet (buruknya perkataan ni). Tapi staff tak peduli, ramai yang senyap-senyap contribute jugak. Last-last medem termalu, dia pun contribute ketupat palas & rendang. Rasanya majlis raya tahun ni paling hambar walaupun ada orang besar-besar datang.

2. The cat is out of the bag. Rahsia yang aku simpan dah dekat 3 tahun ni, akhirnya terbarai secara terpaksa kat ofis. Semuanya gara-gara terpaksa mengisi Borang Perisytiharan Harta, biasalah ofis gomen. Aku dah agak dah, sebab kat borang tu kena declare harta both hubby & wife. So awal-awal lagi aku beritahu Cherin (medem's PA), on a need-to-know basis. Dia terperanjat sampai termenangis, sebab tak sangka, selama ni nampak aku OK je (heroin tenang, beb).

Unfortunately masa Cherin kumpul borang semua staf & bawa masuk ke bilik medem, medem terus sebut a few names yang dia interested in sebab 'orang lama ni, mesti banyak simpan harta'. My name kena sebab 'husband dia doktor mesti banyak duit'. Adeehhhh mentaliti dia ni mentaliti URTV rupanya. Yang nak sibuk tahu sal harta orang kenapa, nak compare ke, kiasu betul la. Anywhichways, bila dia query kenapa borang aku tak declare harta suami, Cherin terpaksa explain, dan Cherin sempat sound kat medem "takde siapa tahu kecuali saya, sekarang puan pulak tahu, rasanya dia memang taknak beritahu orang lain". And then whaddayaknow, she's already told Cheti dan entah siapa-siapa plak lagi, most probably half the female department heads yang selama ni menjadi rakan gosip dia la. Isy isy... how sad when bosses takdak keje lain, dok gosip sal anak buah, kan?

3. One day last week, the Ex called my h/phone, but I didn't answer the call. I hope to goodness it didn't have anything to do with Dik S calling me a few weeks back. Maybe he found out about it, and wants to know what we talked about. But we'll never know now, since I'm not picking up his calls anymore. Dik S, you are still in my prayers.

4. Cheti was offered (and she did take it up) an official trip to China for 4 days, as part of our minister's entourage. We were all trying to discourage her, the reason being she's almost 8 months pregnant! But she was adamant, because this is her first time ever being offered an overseas official trip, and she's afraid of not getting such chance in the future. Faham la, sebab recently Chetun got to go to Korea, and last year I got the Japan trip. Hey, before you guys think 'orang gomen jalan makan angin', I'll just clarify that both the Japan & Korea trip was JPA's friendship/exchange programme, so bukan duit gomen yang keluar, it's mainly sponsored by the Japanese & Korean government, OK?

Back to Cheti, dia ni frame besar, dan historically memang semua anak dia kecik, birthweight 1.8kg etc. So even dia pregnant dah masuk 8 bulan, perut nampak cam 4 bulan je, especially covered dengan baju kurung & tudung. So OK, maybe 'lepas' la kat airport nanti, but we are worried about her & baby's health. Furthermore the weather in China is quite extreme at the moment, also there's the bird flu scare etc. Minister's entourage pun bukan gi sana duduk dalam hotel je, group tu akan visit various depts/inst/plants etc, they'll be moving around. I hope Cheti's well-prepared for all that.

5. Chesa's baby boy is currently warded at Hospital Putrajaya, suspected dengue. I hope he gets well soon!

6. Chedah's hubby just underwent a knee operation early this week, hope everything goes well & he gets to walk again soon.

7. Three of our staff got transferred out, and we're getting only one replacement staff. Someone in HR seriously needs to learn to count! Demand kerja macam-macam, tapi staff yang bagus asyik kena pinch aje.

8. Cheton got promoted to E44 because she passed her PTK last year (yang aku, Cheti & Chedah kantoi tu), and she's in a new department doing something totally different from her last post. She's still excited, hari-hari ada je cerita baru :-)

9. I've picked up a new hobby - Sudoku! Masa sekolah dulu, akulah orang paling benci numbers, kalau Add Maths tu selalunya cukup makan je nasib baik tak kantoi. Tapi Sudoku ni best, actually it's just a puzzle using numbers, bukannya maths pun. It can really get so engrossing tau, I bought a sudoku puzzle book and I've been snatching a few minutes here & there to do the puzzles, and I'm now on to puzzle number 64.

Well, that wraps it up for now, I guess.

Monday, November 21, 2005


You Are A: Kitten!

kitty catCute as can be, kittens are playful, mischevious, and ever-curious. Kittens are often loving, but are known to scratch or bite when annoyed. These adorable animals are the most popular pets in the United States--37% of American households have at least one cat. Whether it is your gentle purr or your disarming appearance, you make a wonderful kitten.

You were almost a: Bear Cub or a Monkey
You are least like a: Groundhog or a ChipmunkWhat Cute Animal Are You?



Lihatlah sekitar alam
Dunia luas terbentang
Langit tinggi kebiruan
Pohon-pohon kehijauan
Hembusan bayu yang menyegarkan

Dengarkan di sana-sini
Beburung riang menyanyi
Berbunga aneka warna
Sumber kedamaian jiwa
Mensyukuri nikmat Maha Esa

Begitu berharga kehidupan ini
Bagi mereka yang tahu menghargai
Mengapa terdorong oleh perasaan
Kalau turutkan hati diri menjadi korban

Tiada yang dapat lari dari masalah diri
Hadapi lah dengan tenang
Tiap cabaran yang datang
Atasinya dengan keimanan

Sekadar buat renungan
Untukmu teman tersayang
Hitam putih masa depan
Sendirian menentukan
Hidup ini usah persiakan

*Jie psyching herself up for tomorrow's monday blues*

Lyrics to Sheila Majid's song, courtesy of


A wedding is almost always a joyous occassion, for the wedding couple as well as their respective families & friends. Why do people get married? For love, you say. For companionship, for procreation {let's be honest - for lust also, right?}. Some get into it at the persuasion of their families (mak suruh) and some family-arranged marriages even have political or financial interests to strengthen. The more religious might even say it is a religious obligation to marry when the time comes. What do YOU look for in a marriage? What does SHE look for?

Japan's Princess Nori (unofficial name) an only princess born to the current imperial family, relinquished all her birthrights, including title and allowances, upon her marriage to a commoner Yoshiki Kuroda. She had already quit her part-time job before the wedding, and is set to become a housewife in the near future. Sounds easy? Boy, does she have a lot to learn!

Rasa-rasanya kat Mesia ni, ada ke orang yang sanggup buat gini?

Tapi takpe, at least Yoshiki tu handsome sket, hopefully anak depa nanti lawa la berbanding muka famili maknya. Maknya tak lawa, tapi selalu senyum, manis gak la.

Saturday, November 19, 2005


Today I had an unexpected and a little disturbing phone call on my mobile. Actually, that number (from another mobile) has been coming up on my phone since the last few days, but some of the times I missed the call because I was away from my desk or the phone was on silent mode, or just plainly ignored because it wasn't a familiar number. When it rang for the umpteenth time today, I decided to pick up the call.

Hello, boleh saya bercakap dengan *Jie*?
Ya, ni siapa ni?
Awak tak kenal saya, tapi saya kenal la awak sikit-sikit

After much dilly-dally, and 'camana nak cakap ye', she finally said, saya isteri *my Ex*

I was speechless for a while. She sounded young, at least younger than me la. Lots of pauses in between words. Uncertainty. Fear. Do I hear a choking-back-tears in her voice?

Apparently she was given my number since they first started being friends "in case you want to ask anything about me", he said. To show that he was sincere and has nothing to hide. But she never felt it necessary to call me, until now. She asks me to tell her what he is really like because "I'm confused", she said.

I was torn between decisions. On one hand, I could tell her my past experience, why I did what I did, but I risk 'influencing' any future decisions that she might make, and that would be wrong. On the other hand, I can empathize with what she is going through, and I pity her, and leaving her helpless like that is also wrong.

In the end, I apologized for not being able to offer her any help. I felt guilty, but I have always considered marriage to be a very private matter, and since I am an outsider, I have no rights whatsoever to say anything, good or bad. We were both choking on our words by then. I hope against hope that she doesn't get too mistreated, to the extent of bodily harm. Just one parting advice, I asked if she is close to her family. She said yes. And I told her "dik, kalau ada masalah yang adik tak boleh handle, rujuklah kepada keluarga adik dan keluarga dia juga, mungkin berbincang boleh jumpa jalan penyelesaian". Family support at times like this is crucial. I know this from experience.

Dik S, I will keep you in my doa from this time onwards.

Friday, November 18, 2005


I've been looking into the mirror quite often lately. I meant that metaphorically. Not that there's so much physical beauty pun to feed off my ego on, biasa aje. Most of the time, I wonder who is this person looking back at me? At the moment I don't really like her very much.

She used to be happier. Enjoys life. Socializes with friends after hours. Pursues her interests. Have fun!

Now she's sober bordering moody at times. Doesn't have much life outside. Rarely goes out with friends anymore. No current interests to pursue. No fun.

Is this the price of age, of maturity? Perhaps. Or the burden of getting on with life, the story of daily survival? There are hunger pangs, still unsatisfied.

Don't understand? Don't bother. This post is too encrypted even for my own brain. Adeehhhh... fenin.

Thursday, November 10, 2005


Di balik cermin mimpi
Aku melihat engkau
Di dalam engkau
Aku melihat aku
Ternyata kita adalah sama
Di arena mimpi yang penuh bermakna

Bila bulan bersatu dengan mentari
Bayang-bayang ku hilang
Di selebungi kerdip nurani
Mencurah kasih, kasih murni
Mencurah kasih

Di balik cermin, cermin mimpi
Adalah realiti yang tidak kita sedari
Hanya keyakinan dapat merestui
Hakikat cinta yang sejati
Hakikat cinta yang sejati

Dengan tersingkapnya tabir siang
Wajah kita jelas terbayang
Dan terpecah cermin mimpi
Menjadi sinar pelangi

Tuesday, November 08, 2005


Someone in the office mentioned about the 'dodoi' songs (lullabye) currently being aired on radio, where Shiela, Ziana & Dayang sang some traditional malay lullabyes. It's in an effort to retain an almost-forgotten culture, although some of the songs were sang in a pop or jazz style, so defeats the purpose of it being a lullabye or kiddy song, yuch! So I asked, OK what is your favourite lullabye or nursery rhyme, or even traditional songs we used to sing as kids?

Chesyu : "Air pasang dalam..."
Cheza : "Air pasang pagi ler "
Me : "Bukan, air pasang dalam "
Chesyu : "Air pasang dalam, surut pukul tiga "
Chemaj : "Pukul lima la! "
Cheza : "Haah la wrong timing la hang, air pasang pagi surut pukul lima..."
Me : "Aiyo... air pasang dalam, surut pukul lima la!!!"

Such a simple kiddy song pun, so many versions? Memang la perlu ada usaha untuk re-introduce these songs or nursery rhymes to our next generation. I myself could recall only a few common kiddy songs like Rasa Sayang Eh, Can Mali Can, Geylang Si Paku Geylang. Itu belum pikir about folk stories lagi, like Bawang Putih Bawang Merah and Pak Pandir. Banyak yang dah lupa.

Eh, what's with all the violence ye? Rock-a-bye baby, and then the baby and its cradle fall from the bough, with presumably fatal consequences. Which sick person had placed the baby and cradle on top of the tree in the first place? Jack & Jill broke their crown while tumbling down the hill. Frankly getting away with just a gash like that must be a miracle. Che Baba jatuh dalam parit, Che Aminah ketawa jerit-jerit. Yikes, what rude mannerism Che Aminah has.

Then there was the Lagu Tiga Kupang, which we initially thought was an original nonsensical malay nursery rhyme, tapi rupanya is a translation of "Sing A Song Of Sixpence". Ni sixpence tukar jadi tiga posen, pakai currency exchange rate zaman bila ni? :-) Cheza came up with "lompat apek, lompat", to which Chemaj promptly replied to "hoi, tu lagu P.Ramlee dalam Ali Baba Bujang Lapuk la! tapi ada satu lagu tu yang nenek, nenek si bongkok tiga, tu lagu dodoi kan?" To which Cheyah menyampuk "kau pun salah, itu pun lagu dalam filem P.Ramlee, Musang Berjanggut tu" We ended up laughing at ourselves, masing-masing memory pathetic betul hehehe :-P

But one kiddy song really takes the cake la. Cheza's nephew learned it from his teacher in preschool, it's a translation of 'Baa Baa Black Sheep' :-
"Bek bek kambing, kau ada bulu tak? Ya tuan, ya tuan, tiga karung penuh"
Goodness gracious! We couldn't stop laughing for a full 3 minutes hahahaha :-D


Monday, November 07, 2005


I've had this thingy since the past how many years I dunno. Does this happen to you too?

No matter what time I wake up in the morning, 4.30 a.m ka, 5.30 a.m ka, 6.30 a.m ka, I'll be all showered-dolled up-dressed-ready to go to work by 6.55 a.m. Wierd, huh?

So if I can be ready in 25 minutes on days I wake up at 6.30 a.m, where does the extra one hour go on days I wake up at 5.30 a.m? Oooo.... my inner clock must be so screwed up hehehehe :-)

Tapi itu on working days aje la. On weekends or public holidays or even days that I am on leave, try waking me up at 5.30 a.m, and you'll get a nice view of an outline of my bum under the quilt, cause all I'd do is turn away and bury myself deeper under the quilt. Alamatnya, subuh gajah la, lagi 10 minit nak syuruk baru bangun. Ha, tang ni, my inner clock is quite efficient plak. Go figure.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Welcome, Kaez!

Just had a morbid thought. If I died tonight, what's gonna happen to this blog? Hehehe :-) Call it vanity or whatnot, but takkan blog ni pun die terus, tak syok la.

So, in the spirit of sharing and friendship, I hereby cordially invite my buddy Kaez to visit my alternate universe. Welcome, Kaez!

Just click on the link, bebeh.


    Muhammad Amir Haziq

    Dari saat kelopak mata terbuka
    Hingga saat ku terpejam lena
    You are
    My daily upper
    My daily saviour

    Oh yeah, to Ajiq's Mama & Papa, Maklong tumpang ye, hehehe :-)

    Saturday, November 05, 2005


    Perhaps the title ought to be changed to 'To Love Animals' in order to avoid any confusion, huh? But what I mean is not only about humans loving animals (in the good sense - doesn't include love for food or copulation purposes), but also animals loving their humans. If you have pets, you'll know what I mean.

    I have had cats since as far back as I can remember. Then, our house was near a school canteen, so people were always leaving strays there with the hopes that at least the strays can find food at the canteen. Most of the strays instead ended up in our kitchen compound, begging for food and looking so forlorn. At one time, we had as many as 17 cats, phew! The amazing thing was that although the cats were allowed inside our compound, they rarely leave their excrement around. Almost as if every new cat got toilet-trained by the older cats. { Hey you there, newbie, don't shit around 'coz the boss might get upset and kick ALL of us out! }

    Among all the cats I ever had, the one closest to me was the last one I had, called Meor. No, he's not from Perak. He was a 'pariah' kitten that I rescued on my last day at Uni, I had to take him home because he (& a brother) had been abandoned by their mom, and they would surely die if left at the deserted hostels, since it was the semester holidays. He was called Meor because that's how he sounded then, not the high-pitched kitten-mew, but 'mee-yor, mee-yor'. His brother we called Miung, because he was clumsy and kept bumping into furniture :-)

    They were quite well-trained adorable kittens, playing in the neighbour's yard and then come running home to do business in their kitty litter, before going back to play in the neighbour's yard. Thank you dears, you just gave me more mess to clean up hehehe. Ibu used to say, "buat apa bela kucing, kalau bela budak, at least you balik keje dia boleh tolong bukakkan gate" *Jie rolls her eyes*

    Meor is one cat with an attitude. You can shoo him all you like, he won't run away, instead he'll 'jeling' you with a look that says "la ni apa kecoh ni?". He didn't really mind his baths, but how he hated the anti-flea powder! He was a good hunter, and along the years brought back prizes which he sometimes left under my bed or on the 'Welcome' mat at the front door. Prizes ranged from the simple cicak, to mengkarung, to small frogs. Then as he got older and more skilled, he brought lots of sparrows and small birds, sometimes half-eaten, yuck!

    When he got even more skilled, he once brought back a gory-looking half-eaten neighbour's rabbit, which made Ibu so flustered she made me go apologize to our neighbour. Nice one, Meor *snicker*. The best prize he ever brought back was a medium-sized pomfret hehehe entah mana la dia cilok tuh. This, despite being fed Friskies 3 times a day, the fat cat! He came home with numerous scratches and wounds, which I dutifully cleaned with antiseptic, and he even broke his right forepaw once. Didn't deter him from terrorising the neighbourhood, did it?

    Anyway, Meor always had this knack of finding me whenever I feel upset or down. Being an outdoor cat, he sometimes doesn't come home for two or three days especially during the mating seasons. But the days that I reach home after having an argument with a friend or upset with a colleague, or even just bila kena marah ngan Ibu, he would come to me within minutes, rubbing himself on my feet or jumping up on my lap. The stroke therapy plus the purr-purr sounds he made were very soothing. Every now & then he would stretch himself, look at me, and say a short 'awr', as if asking me if I feel better. And he would stay by my side until I actually did feel better.

    Alas, Meor died at the prime age of 5 years old. We believe he was hit by a car, and he promptly hid in the monsoon drain to lick his wounds. By the time he came home, he was limping badly and the wounds were festered, his breath was laboured and rasping. He probably succumbed to septicemia and died in my arms a couple hours later.

    All the previous cats belonged to the family, but Meor was my sole responsibility from the beginning. After that, well, I didn't want another cat. I didn't want to deal with another loss like that. But for a few years after, I'd be walking around the neighbourhood and bumping into young cats with the EXACT MARKINGS like Meor. I'd like to think that his philandering days actually produced several offsprings *wink wink*.

    So, no more cats, especially since now we have my sis's baby Ajiq at home. No, he's not a pet. Mom just thinks that 'hama kucing' would be detrimental to baby Ajiq's health. Right now, my pets are a small tank-full of sea-monkeys from Toys 'R Us. Don't know what they are? Just google 'sea-monkey', if you wanna find out eheh :-)


    So. Aidilfitri has come and gone. It's the dawn of the third day of Syawal, and whaddaheck am I doing already up and posting, you might ask. The heck is that I didn't go to sleep last night, pretty bad decision for someone not-so-youthful as me.

    Initially at around midnight, I started blog-rolling, then read up websites on stuff I was doing some research on. Entah kenapa teringat plak zaman masa mula belajar guna internet, so I logged onto MIRC. Hehehe macam budak-budak! In fact, I signed in as a 25 y-o. No, not exactly lying, just bending the truth a little. I WAS a 25 y-o, just not right now la hehehe :-)

    But that's the thing about MIRC la, you can be anybody from anywhere, doing/working as anything, just as you please. Has changed a lot since I started chatting in 1997. Back then, most pings would begin as "Hi, care to chat? How are you today? I'm so-and-so. What do you do in your free time? Oh, that's my hobby too".

    Last night, since I was using an obviously female nick, I got quite a number of pings from the likes of 'Abg Gersang' and 'PowerMan32' with invitations to do stuff that I won't write about here. { Jie isn't afraid to write the word 'sex' and all that's associated with it, but just prefers not to. She even knows the malay word for fellatio hahaha :-) }

    Greetings were almost always "Hi. ASL pls?". Where's all the nettiquette & politeness, the camaraderie, the interesting conversations, the connecting of minds and souls gone to? I used to chat with gentlemen & ladies of different ages from many walks of life. We chatted about politics (OK this one, better not do these days la), current issues, books, movies, why the sky is blue etc etc. But last night was like an internet version of fast food, "You want the (plump & juicy) Burger, or you want the (footlong) Hotdog?" Aiyo. { OK Jie, old gal, next time stick to blogs & books only ha }

    Excuse me, I think I just heard the azan Subuh.

    Monday, October 31, 2005


    Of late, I've asked myself, do I give enough to the community, as much as I should? Actually the thought came, when I recently read about the 'Sen To Save Lives' campaign by Makna in Dr Bubble's blog. I was excited at the opportunity to effortlessly donate to charity, so I got him to send me a few of the cute donation boxes, and distributed some to friends. Some friends were happy to be contributing (Is asked for 2 boxes, kind guy), but a few were like "tengoklah nanti". I don't want to question what is in their heart or mind, but to me, it shouldn't be a problem. The box is tiny, just drop some extra change from your lunch money every other day, the box would fill up in no time at all.

    Last 2 years, I signed up with an NGO as a part-time volunteer. Semangat berkobar-kobar masa training, and I envisioned doing various things like helping out at orphanages, old folk's homes, hospitals etc. I did get to join some activities, but then I found excuses to skip others. Boring la, tak free la, takde geng la, tempat jauh malas driving la etc. If I had been truly dedicated, I would have joined in, despite all that kan? I would have sacrificed my personal comforts. Instead, I only joined in activities which didn't inconvenient me, namely half-day activities on weekends held at the NGO centre which is nearby my home. Ppfff!

    During the tsunami fiasco early this year, I became a bit more active. Helped collect clothes & foodstuff for donation, then spent time at the NGO operation centre to sort out & box them for shipment to the disaster areas. But that's about it la. I could've done more, like volunteer to help at the shelters in Kedah/Penang, but the mind says 'tak payah la, leceh nanti'. Again, I only did what was not inconvenient to me.

    Aside from that, my only other current charitable contribution to the society is blood donation. Nak derma duit, yelah keje gomen ni berapa sangatlah pitih yang ada. Blood donation is so effortless {the 'effortless' word again! Jie memang taknak nyusahkan diri sendiri ye?} and doesn't cost a thing. After all if you don't donate that blood, in 120 days (betul ke 120 days? rasanya la) it would disintegrate and be replaced with new blood. But if you donate, your body instantly starts to manufacture new replacement blood. Healthy, yes? Most importantly, you may be saving lives. And maybe another time, someone else's blood may save your life too.

    Plus, your blood would be screened for certain illnesses, so if the tests turn out positive, at least you will get an early warning from the blood bank. But please, blood donation SHOULD NOT be used as an el-cheapo blood-screening, so if you know you have/possibly have serious illness like AIDS, Hepatitis etc, STAY AWAY FROM BLOOD DONATIONS. Sadly many among my friends aren't inclined to donate blood. Tak perlu, takut jarum, tak cukup darah, nanti pengsan blah de blah blah. Early this year when my agency held a blood drive, only three people (including me) from my department came forward.

    So, have I done enough for my community? Have you done enough? I think I've started to care more, but I need a structured volunteer activity and some constant encouragement to keep it up. I need to find the drive. I need to find the calling. I wish I can be more committed, and I wish my family would be more supportive of it too. I'm gonna have to look deeper within myself, and ask the question again.


    It's the last week of Ramadhan, only 4 days away from Aidilfitri. The whole of today was spent ferrying mom around for her shopping. We reached Sogo at around 10.15, and already the parking was almost full! I guess actually a good number of people just park their vehicles in Sogo and then go shopping in Jalan TAR, since the usual parking spaces in Jalan TAR have been converted into construction sites. Anyway, duit keluar macam air, in a matter of a few hours, we came out about RM400 poorer, bukannya banyak barangnya pun! Tu baru barang kecik-kecik untuk rumah, like cookie canisters, table runners etc. Belum kira personal items like baju, tudung, kasut etc. By afternoon, there were so many people (mostly men) sitting on pavements everywhere holding plastic bags. Tu mesti dah letih sangat tunggu wife dok shopping :-) Well, ikutkan sajalah. Wife tu shopping pun untuk seisi keluarga, bukannya untuk diri dia sorang, kan?

    Personally, Raya festivities have ceased to mean much to me these days. {Tak baik cakap gini Jie!} Oh I know, hari mulia meraikan kebaikan, bermaafan & kunjung-mengunjungi antara keluarga, jiran & sahabat yadda yadda yadda. I understand the spiritual context of it. But the festivities & tradition, dah maleh nak layan la. Pegi rumah relatives, I'd hear whispers from the makciks to my mom "Jie camana sekarang, dah ada orang?" Duit raya, well tahun ni aku banyak commitment, so takde kasik, except to my bro & nephew je. Anak orang lain datang umah aku, sori takde salam kaup ye. Buat kuih pun, just my favourites, some of which will surely end up in my own tummy, yum! {Camana nak tuyus???} Tart nenas! Tart nenas! Raya dishes, bab ni takleh escape since I'm just the assistant chef, so kena ikutkan aje la arahan Ibu a.k.a Chief Cook.

    Anyway, you guys have fun for Hari Raya, OK? Jangan main/kasik anak main mercun, esok-esok kang susah nak sarung cincin plak. Jangan makan berlebihan {ya right, Jie. You should take heed of this advice yourself!}. Drive carefully, Ops Sikap baru start pun dah ada 15 korban. Tahun ni Raya panjang, so dapat la balik kampung lama kan?

    As for me, I'm celebrating Raya here in PJ {nak pi mana lagi Jie oii, sini la pun rumah hang}. And as usual, jadi 'dapur officer'. Baju kurung pun pakai 2-3 jam je, once relatives start coming, kena tukar uniform. OK I know this is not in the spirit of Aidilfitri, but I'm thinking of going shopping, possibly watch a movie on second Raya. Hmm... kena cari geng ni...

    Sunday, October 23, 2005


    Earlier yesterday was spring cleaning day at my home. My my, I didn't realize how cluttered my room (and ultimately my life?) had become. Books & mags scattered here & there, unopened citibank & astro bills, a whole pile of papers & stuff on my desk. Must've been that 'ala bukannya ada saper nak tengok pun' attitude which had plagued me of late. Tidy up, tidy up, hang up laundered clothes, pick up books off the floor, change bedsheet, vacuum carpet etc etc.

    Then, I made a stupid mistake. I decided to open my teakwood chest, and found The Album. The chest is where I keep my most personal stuff, where nobody (I hope) ever get into. I haven't seen The Album for a good part of the last 2 years. I pondered for a while, then I made the second stupid mistake. I opened The Album. I couldn't help it, tears turned to sobs, but still I turned the pages. Images of a younger me looking like a princess of the day, madly in love, eyes sparkling with joy, posing and flirting with the lenses, demure smiles masking the thump thump in my heart, a little fearful but much anticipation of the coming nightfall and all that it promises. Such innnocence. Little did I know.

    Maybe some day, I hope sooner rather than later, I will fall in love again, get hitched, build up a family. But it will be a different kind of love. A different kind of intensity. A different kind of relationship. A different behaviour towards my partner.

    It will all be different, because I AM different now.

    I am jaded.

    And I cried for the innocence, lost forever, never to be regained, nor given to another.

    Allah? Do you hear my cries?

    Thursday, October 13, 2005


    What's a Guarantor in a loan agreement? Damn, I don't have a law dictionary in hand, but basically in layman's term, he's the guy who's helping you get your loan. The financier don't really trust you enough to lend you money, but when your Guarantor comes into the picture, the financier says "hey ok, this other guy obviously trusts the applicant enough to serah leher dia to us in case the applicant doesn't repay his loan, so let's give the applicant the loan lah" The Guarantor is THAT important to you at that point of time, yes?

    So you get the loan & enjoy the money, build up your life, gets you that cushy job, bungalow on the hill and cars with pedigree (not-the-local-mongrel pr*t*n). Do you split the money with the guy who helped you get the loan a.k.a The Guarantor? Nope. Nada. Illek puchek. Does he get any benefit at all for risking his neck for you? Nope. Nada. Illek puchek. All from the goodness of his heart.

    Time passes, you start paying the monthly instalments. More time passes, you start to prioritize other things above settling your debt. Hey, I need that RM250 karaoke session MORE than I need to repay my loan. I need that RM450 facial and full-body massage MORE than I need to repay my loan. I need this I want that who cares about my loan repayment after all I am not the only one who has defaulted so they better go chase after those defaulters who have bigger loans than me and besides I am entitled to all that money it is my birthright { Jie, tarik nafas... hembus... tarik nafas... hembus...fuuhh letihnya }.

    So now after copious efforts to contact you through phone, numerous letters of reminder, several notices of demand, even visits to your last known address, we are left with no choice but to file a civil suit in court against you and your Guarantor(s). But here's the thing, you moved and never informed us of your latest address. You seem to have disappeared from the face of the earth, but we managed to track down your Guarantor and serve the summons on him. So now, who's neck is on the chopping board? Your Guarantor, of course. Kesian dia, kesiaannn diaaa, penyu menangis siapalah yang tahuuuu...

    Your Guarantor (most likely to have been a friend of your parents, or neighbours from kampung and most likely to be in their 40s, 50s or 60s, or relatives or even your own family members) comes to our office in a state of shock and confusion, sometimes anger too.
    "Encik, bukan saya yang berhutang, kenapa saman saya?"
    "Puan, makcik tak kenal peminjam ni, bapak dia yang mintak makcik tolong jadi penjamin, kenapa saman makcik?"
    "Cik, duit ni tak dapat ke saya pun, saya cuma niat nak tolong anak bangsa supaya dapat melanjutkan pelajaran, kenapa saman saya?"
    "Nak, pakcik dah pencen, ada sakit jantung, kenapa saman pakcik?"

    Adeeehhh.... susahnya nak explain pada pakcik-makcik ni that by law, the guarantor's liability is the same, jointly & severally, as that of the borrower's, it's all stated there in clause 4 of our standard loan agreement! Tak, bukan susah nak cakap, our officers are very articulate I-tey-you. We are after all, qualified lawyers (loyar buruk pun ada). Yang susahnya ialah berat hati dan berat lidah nak beritahu pakcik-makcik ni betapa angkara orang yang mereka pernah tolong jamin dulu membuatkan diri mereka sekarang 'terancam'.

    Kesannya? Well, one bank dulu pernah tahan duit pencen some of these unfortunate people. Nasib baik they've scrapped off that policy now. Some Guarantors have failed to secure loans for themselves or even to act as guarantors for their own children's study loans. Aside from the financial hassle, it is a matter of honour and justice to these kind old souls. Mak-Ayah kita ni memang takut dengan mahkamah, malu bila kena saman, nak-nak lagi bukan atas 'dosa' diri mereka sendiri, semua ni tak adil dan menjejaskan maruah diri mereka.

    Along these years, I have encountered all kinds of borrowers giving all kinds of excuses under the sun. The genuine down-on-the-luck cases, yes we treat with compassion. But some others seem to take pleasure in pulling the smoke curtain over our eyes, telling sob stories, making promises, giving out dud cheques etc. Oh yeah, we usually can detect the phonies from a mile away, but procedures say we have to give 'em a second chance. Some try the offensive tactic, marah-marah, threaten & intimidate us, try to get underneath our skins. Some resort to the all-famous trick of 'main tarik kabel', oh you know what I mean. Macam-macam endorsement ada, cuma endorsement Pak Lah je yang aku belum jumpa. People, WTFF huh?

    Along these years also, I have met many Guarantors. We try to be as gentle as possible with them, but yet duty dictates that we have to be firm in what we do. Nak buek camno, da big kahunna keep hounding us on collection, collection, collection. There have been many occassions where the Guarantors break down in tears, mengenangkan nasib malang mereka, madu yang dihulur dibalas tuba { Jie! terer pepatah ye, macam Karam Singh Walia hehehe }. On several of those occassions, I couldn't stop my own tears from falling. Kesian diaaa, kesiaaannn diiaaa...

    One particular case touched me deeply indeed. This pakcik from Kelantan living on his RM480 duit pencen with his wife, is the father of a defaulter with a RM120K loan. Soon after finishing his studies, the borrower clashed with some family members, then bawa diri lari ke US. That was back in the late 1980s. After a few years, they lost contact with him. When we filed the civil suit, the guarantors (who were the pakcik's friends) got very angry to the extent of 'serang' this pakcik at home with a parang. Heboh satu kampung, sampai pakcik ni sekarang jadi kera sumbang.

    So the pakcik comes to us, asking for advice. He has since been paying RM50 a month in an effort to stave-off the civil suit. But we tell him, this is inadequate. The only way this loan can ever be 'neutralized' is if the borrower has passed away. The pakcik, with tears in his eyes says, "pokcik redha la klu dia mati sekalipung, asake dok susohke oghe (guarantors) laing" But there is no way of knowing the whereabouts of the borrower, short of hiring private detectives. The next best step is to get a declaration of death from the High Court. But the costs of this procedure is in the regions of RM5K to RM8K, which the pakcik can't afford. We helped him get legal aid, the wheels were put in motion, but then the court says, hey you gotta go track him in the US first then, get a verification from the local police and our consulate there. All avenues now seem to lead to dead ends for this pakcik.

    The really sad part is seeing this pakcik every time he comes to our office with his luggage bag. I asked him how (mode of transport) he comes to KL?
    "Pokcik naik bah male dari Kota Bharu, sampa sini subuh, pokcik gi masjid kejap. Pahtu pokcik jale ke sini (jauh tu from the terminal-masjid-my office!). Ning lepah ni pokcik gi masjid lagi, semaye, tido sebeta, pete ni pokcik naik bah pulak kelik Kota Bharu"
    "Jauhnya pakcik jalan!"
    "Pokcik takdok pitih nok naik teksi"

    Never once did this pakcik argue, or raise his voice, or even say any bad words against his son or the guarantors. Hanya matanya yang berkaca-kaca sambil bibirnya berkata "pokcik redha"
    Imagine, dalam kedhaifan pencen RM480, dia cuba bayar RM50 sebulan untuk kurangkan hutang anaknya, not knowing how or where his son is and at the same time trying to get the courts to declare that his beloved son is dead, while spending precious money, time & effort coming down to KL every 2-3 months to our office. My heart goes out to him! Kasih seorang ayah tak mengenal batasan.

    Conclusion - sendiri hutang, sendiri bayar la, jangan nak menyusahkan orang lain, seperti kacang lupakan kulitnya. Sekian sahaja saya Karam Jie Walia melaporkan untuk TV33.


    AlhamduliLlah, first week of Ramadhan has been & gone, one down three more to go! Unfortunately, my buddy came by and she's still around, so I've not been fasting for a few days already. I say 'unfortunately', because I don't like not fasting early in Ramadhan. Nanti by the next week orang semua dah biasa & relax puasa, kita baru terhegeh-hegeh nak get used to the hunger pangs, isy. Lagipun dah tak semangat nak start terawih by then.

    I can't remember { signs of aging, ye Jie? } when it was I first started to fast, probably in darjah satu. Mula tu puasa half a day, Abah tolong kira. Dia kata, berapa hari boleh beraya depends on berapa hari puasa. So tolak-campur congak-congak, I think I got something like 12 days. Sooo excited, I thought I'd be getting duit raya every day for 12 days. Tipah tertipu bang...

    Started puasa for whole days, probably a year or two after that. Tapi kekadang tu kecundang jugak hehehe. I think when I was in boarding school, ada la a few times yang tak tahan terlalu dahaga, so batal puasa dengan minum. Makan tak berani la, minum tu pun air dari sinki bilik air, kekonon basuh muka, tapi sambil tu teguk sikit hehehe :-)

    Tapi bila time tabley puasa tu, especially if ada geng, balik hostel tengahari, masak maggi! Heran, bila berpuasa tak la terasa lapar sangat, tapi bila tak puasa perut bernyanyi-nyanyi. I think it's all in the mind. Bila kita ikhlas niat berpuasa untuk beribadat, our subconscious mind tells the body system to slow down with the gastric juices. Sebab tu jugak la smokers pun boleh takde smoke craving waktu berpuasa, tapi for the rest of the year punyalah susah nak berhenti merokok, kan?

    So I read somewhere that puasa is the only ibadah yang solely hak Allah. Meaning, you fast because you do it for no one else but Allah, as He demands of you. Lagipun, only you & He would know if you puasa dengan sempurna or not because it is intangible, unlike other ibadahs even solat for instance, where you solat for Him but other people can see you solat. Tapi banyak gak kes orang tak puasa la. OK, I'm not patronising (or 'matronising', if you are a feminist) anyone, far from it as I know I am not a perfect muslim either. Just an observation. Tapi bak kata orang tua-tua, 'pandai makan, pandai la sorok' - in this case it is literally kena pandai makan sorok-sorok! I'm just sad to see that sometimes tu, dah la tak puasa, pastu makan in public pulak. So lepas tu, jangan la marah kalau ada orang non-muslim yang question sejauh mana kita punya iman & aqidah.

    Dah, dah, Jie bukan ustazah yang nak berceramah. Each to his own, kubur sendiri-sendiri kan. Jie pun manusia yang terlalu kerdil di sisi Allah, ada gak kecundang puasa, ada gak culas solat, and a whole myriad of other dosa yang tak payah cerita la. But perhaps this holy month is a good time for self-evaluation, muhasabah diri setakat mana kita dah berusaha untuk buat yang terbaik untuk dunia & akhirat?

    Wednesday, October 05, 2005


    Your Personality Is

    Idealist (NF)

    You are a passionate, caring, and unique person.
    You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals.

    You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily.
    Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings.

    You seek out other empathetic people to befriend.
    Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships.

    In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily.

    At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career.

    With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone.

    As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style.

    On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.

    I'm so bored being cooped up at home on my third day of MC with this horrible horrible stomach flu... errgh! Whatthehey let's do this 3-Qs test, how accurate can the results be? Not bad, actually, some of 'em quite 'kena' jugak.

    Friday, September 30, 2005


    Sender :
    O*** HP

    Sent :

    Hi N***,rang undang2 islam wilayah persekutuan, ciptaan shahrizat betul2 tidak membela langsung balu, janda dan anakdara tua. kesian kami. one day i wish dia jadi janda dan bercinta ngan suami org. Apa agaknya reaksi dia nanti. Jika tercommit adultery sapa gaknya punya pasal..


    Ooooo... this sms is so wrong on so many levels!

    OK, backtrack a little. It was sent by a friend (let's call her The Widow) who has been widowed for a year plus. She lost her hubby to an illness, and now currently bringing up her kids all by herself. I know, sad story, I feel for her too. Life gave her a big ugly turn, and her being able to cope with it (so far) is admirable. One can just imagine how tough her life is at the mo.

    I personally have been lending her a shoulder-and-a-half, as I too have gone through a similar loss, albeit in a different way. I can understand her loneliness, helplessness, frustrations, her angry lashings to the world in general, her self-pity and all. Been there, done that, hated the tshirt! But there is such a thing as carrying it out too far la.

    OK she's lonely, needs companion. Hell, we all feel that. She's thinking "at my age, a balu with kids, no single man would ever want me". So the next best thing is to find companionship with a more matured married or have-been-married guy {haiya, senang cakap, laki orang atau duda}, who will look beyond her age or status, who's not afraid to shoulder fatherhood responsibilities for her kids yadayadayada. So now she's in a relationship with a married guy (let's call him Mr Truant) but she's facing opposition from everyone - her family, his family, his wife, her friends, his friends, even the neighbour's dogs la.

    Here's the thing - she undertook this adventure {misadventure kot?} fully knowing about all the hurdles she'll be facing from the community, because once she had the very same opinions, before she lost her hubby. Pompuan, be it anak dara or janda, yang berkawan ngan laki orang tu, adalah pompuan gatal perosak rumahtangga yang hina dan laknat. But now that she's 'friends' with Mr Truant, she's lamenting about how his wife is cruel because his wife mengamuk when she got to know about her hubby's relationship with The Widow. How masyarakat is unfair, tak faham dan tak membantu etc. How her family is cruel and prejudiced towards Mr Truant. How her friends are judgmental and 'menyibuk' because they don't approve.

    Dear The Widow, you are my friend and I do wish you happiness. But you also have to be rational. Kalau dulu you jealous bila laki you ada kawan pompuan (walaupun kawan biasa), kenapa nak marah sekarang bila wife Mr Truant jealous of your (romantic) relationship ngan laki dia? Whilst you were happily married, did you ever give a thought about how your single friends' lives were? Did you even care? Oh I know, now your perspective has changed because you are faced with that situation, cuma orang yang dah merasa sahaja yang tahu kan? But at the same time, you cannot expect everybody to change their perspective to suit yours, kan?

    Personally, I'm not opposed to poligamy { ye ker Jie???? }, only that I think it should only be practiced by people who have equipped themselves fully for it. Guys, just having the equipment is not enough tau. By 'equipped' I mean, dah cukup faham konsep poligamy dan tanggungjawab semua pihak, dah cukup iman dan keredhaan dalam hati, doing it for the right purpose and not for nafsu alone, adil, mampu physically, monetarily and spiritually etc. Kalau cukup syarat, no problem.

    If you're really serious about it, then find the problem and fix it. Why lash out to other people like that? Why lash out against Shahrizat's good proposals (to ensure the first wives' and children's welfare is taken care of)? Why wanna wish bad things unto other people (" day i wish dia jadi janda dan bercinta ngan suami org...")? Apa plak kaitannya dengan 'tercommit adultery'? There is no such thing as 'ter' in adultery, it's something that both parties consciously consent to, otherwise it would be rape la kan?

    If you wanna be gung-ho then do it like Nike (Just Do It!) Bukannya susah la ni, takyah gi Narathiwat, kat Perlis pun boleh. Better still, kalau guy tu confident & macho, get the local Syariah Court's approval, which shouldn't be a problem if he is qualified in the Islamic sense.

    Oh well.

    Wednesday, September 28, 2005

    HARI Q

    Ini salah satu event paling gomen yang seingat aku la hehehe :-) Generally, Hari Q(uality) ni, is for the department's management to show appreciation to their staff, to award & honor staf yang cemerlang & berkualiti etc. Sup-po-sed-ly la.

    Anywhichways, we had our Hari Q last Friday, a day before Hari Keluarga. Usually, selain dari acara biasa - you know la, baca ikrar Q, nyanyi lagu organization, nyanyi lagu perkhidmatan awam, kasik sijil & hadiah - we will have a short ceramah either by the department boss (beri penghargaan dan bakar semangat supaya staf jadi lebih rajin etc. Sup-po-sed-ly la) ataupun panggil penceramah luar untuk beri ceramah berkaitan menjalankan tugas dengan Q(uality).

    This year, we invited Ustaz Wan Sohor Bani Leman. Yay! Ustaz hensem! Hehehe :-) Ehem, the handsome part tu actually beside the point la kan. The ceramah was interesting, macam 'kena' je. The gist of his ceramah was (1)buat keje dengan ikhlas & amanah (2)jangan mengumpat (3)Islam memandang seseorang sebagai berkualiti on a wholesome basis (4)jangan mengumpat (5)bahaya mengumpat (6)perempuan yang badan gempal lebih bernafsu dari yang terlalu kurus. Ehhh...???? Ha yang no. 6 tu, selingan je, tapi maybe betul kot? *wink wink* hehehe. Ustaz ni suka illustrate his points melalui cerita kisah2 nabi, so macam-macam kisah Nabi Muhammad s.a.w, A'isyah, sahabat2 etc.

    Ambil iktibar dari ceramah Ustaz. Kualiti dalam Islam ialah secara menyeluruh, mesti buat baik sesama manusia dan dengan Allah. Takde gunanya jadi orang yang baik perilaku tapi tidak beriman kepada Allah. Dan tidak berkualiti juga jika hanya beribadat kepada Allah tapi tak menjaga hubungan baik sesama manusia. Kena ada IQ (intelligence), EQ (emotional), SQ (spiritual) dan PQ (physical). Maksudnya kena pandai fikir, pandai jaga perasaan (sendiri & orang lain), pandai dalam ibadah, dan pandai bikin serupa cakap.

    Hmm... mula tadi nak tulih gak about how medem sabotage our Hari Q bila taknak berucap langsung untuk majlis ni walaupun dia akan hadir. Camana plak pada majlis untuk pengurusan award & honor staf cemerlang, bos plak taknak berucap? After that we all dah setkan menu jamuan (nasi beriani), tinggal nak reconfirm je ngan caterer, tetiba dia suruh kensel semua, gantikan ngan laksa johor AND nasi dagang. Then tetiba je pagi tu dia kata kat Chetun yang dia ada meeting (walhal diari meeting dia memang confirm kosong waktu tu) dia suruh kami start majlis dulu dan dia akan datang bila time Ustaz mula ceramah.

    Also mula tadi nak tulih gak about how ridiculous the anugerah Q yang medem kasik tahun ni - bukan kasik kat saper yang keje rajin/cemerlang, instead kasik kat orang yang takde MC (ni OK la), orang yang paling kurang gunakan peruntukan perubatan (WTF?) and lagi 8 orang untuk Anugerah Khas Pengarah yang takde kriteria pemilihan ditentukan, instead nama penerimanya dipetik dari langit (WTFF???)

    Aku sendiri dapat sijil & hamper on that perubatan thingy, tapi aku sedekahkan je hamper tu kat assistant aku, because I really fail to see WTF that has got to do with Quality. I mean, kebetulan tahun ni badan aku sihat, so aku pekerja kualiti ke? What about others yang tak pernah sakit but anak ramai and quota perubatan dia banyak habis kat anak, so dia pekerja tak kualiti sebab anak dia selalu sakit? {Oooppp... dah cukup le tu Jie. Kan Ustaz Wan Sohor Hensem kata, jangan mengumpat?} OKla OKla stop sampai sini je la hehehe :-)